LMTV #64: Internal Hostage Situation

Do you have such high hopes and expectations for yourself that you hold yourself hostage to achieving them?

Personal Standards. Lofty Goals. High Expectations. Ever had any of these? Perhaps you have them even now!

And, do you, perhaps, carry a virtual whip around in order to make sure you “toe the line” and never deviate from your “designated path”?

Well, in many respects, this behavior is quite understandable.

When we are young, we look up to the adults in our lives, and the advice they are only too happy to give us is no doubt intended to help us succeed in the world. But the truth is, we’re set onto a road of never-ending self-improvements from a very early age. Almost all of us have messages like these fed to us like a constant diet of don’t-let-me-down gruel:

  • Get good grades.
  • Do your best.
  • Make me proud.
  • Come back a winner.
  • <Add your own favorite here!>

Do you by any chance remember this line from one of America’s popular songs from the 70s?

Oz never did give nothin’ to the Tin Man, that he didn’t, didn’t already have.

You see, you can listen to the advice of others all you want. And some of it may even be useful and helpful. But you already have all the wisdom, knowledge and ability you need in order to live your life in the best way possible. The truth is, if you let yourself just BE YOU, you’ll be good at pretty much anything you do. A parent. A partner. A friend. A business owner. A ditch digger. No matter what your passion might be.

However, there is still the problem, isn’t there? You may hear in your mind that you’ve never quite made it yet, that you’re not quite there, that you’ve got to keep trying. This is because the encouraging voices of others that you heard before can transform themselves into the demanding voice of your own inner-personal disapproval. As a result, you may carrying some unconscious disempowering beliefs like you can never have what you need, or that you can never meet the expectations that have been set for you.

We picked up and adopted expectations that were told to us over and over again, until we believed them wholeheartedly. And now, we hold our own feet to the fire in order to ensure that somehow, some way, we finally fulfill some high hope. Before we die. Please.

The Soul Talk Guys think it’s high time we stop doing this to ourselves. There is no need for any of us to seek to be perfect and make ourselves crazy in the process. David & Tommy want to encourage you and help you to lay down your burden once and for all, and start living the kind of life that really matters to you.

Check out this week’s video, and start untying another knot so as to set yourself free.

And please remember to leave a comment below!

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